Remember I told you I was a machine? Well, there are machines and then there are machines. In the realm of machine world, I am a can opener. It was a very humbling and tiring realization.
My workout with my trainer yesterday was brutal. Seriously, brutal. I am going to put my one little excuse in before I go on. I forgot my lunch. So after work I went straight to the gym with no food in my belly. Now, normally I can live off the fat of the land and the worst thing that happens is I'm cranky. That was before I met Mr. Muscle builder/killer/drill sergeant/best friend.
I arrived a few minutes early for my workout and the manager suggested I hop on the treadmill. A state of the art, cup holder, remote control in the other space workout machine. Nice and cush. I hopped on and changed the channel from CNN to Bravo to watch Top Chef. Ha, the irony. At least I didn't put it on the Food Network. Off I went on my little stroll.
Here comes my guy. Hey, Kelly. How was your week he asks as he turns up the incline and speed. He disperses with more general chit chat. What's new with you? I proudly told him how I did what I was supposed to do during the past two weeks. Which I did, really I did. He smiles and cranks up the incline and speed. I am really kind of working now, but this is about the intensity I do at home, so I can hang.
More small talk, more cranking of incline, more incline, more incline. I am up to 15 now and at the stage where I can talk, but don't want to. Or, if I did talk it was going to be really mean and hateful. What I want to do is snap off everyone of his fingers on the hand which is turning up the incline. That is what I really, really want to do.
He continues to chat and now we are on the debate on Jessica Simpson's weight trouble. He goes on to say she isn't fat, but if you are marketing yourself as an actress...more talk but I don't know what he is saying now, it's all a blur. I am losing it now. I really am starting to get dizzy from not eating (I hope that's why), it couldn't possibly be that I am more out of shape than I thought.
Where in the hell is my ham sandwich I made for lunch. It was a healthy ham sandwich. Lean ham, mustard and fresh spinach and avocado on Dakota bread. Where is it?
Well, I survived the treadmill and downed two bottles of water, because I sweat out five bottles of water in the last 20 minutes. I really didn't know the treadmill could inflict such harm. Wake up call. Even though I was doing my workouts at home evidently I didn't push myself as hard as I should have.
We proceed to the back for the rest of the workout. Good bye top chefs.
We start doing circuit training. I am struggling, but manage. I am still dizzy. Then he says o.k. it's time to do some up/downs. Up/downs? You mean like what they make football players do at practice? You mean like the ones my son used to complain about while I gave the speech on how he could do anything he set his mind to? Those up/downs? The ones where if I had of eaten my ham sandwich I would have puked it up on his pretty new Nikes. Ahhh, shit. It is those up/downs.
/mental breakdown.
O.K. I do them. They aren't that fast but my form is great, o.k. it's suitable. The song Gonna Make You Sweat Till You Bleed, (Everybody Dance Now) comes on and he turns it up so loud to pump me up. Now, I am doing up/downs, still dizzy and now I have a headache. BUT.... I do them, because like I told my son, if you set your mind to it, you can do it. I will think twice before I give another inspirational speech to my kids. It always, comes back to bite you.
This session was truly a wake up call for me. I knew I was out of shape, but I have always been active. I guess I need to work a lot harder to get back to where I want to be. To my defense he did admit he was extra hard on me because his previous clients of the day were all old people. I guess I should be happy he doesn't consider me to be old people, even though I could be his mom or his really nice aunt.
The good news: I did join this century and bought an I-Pod Shuffle to help me through the tough times. I can't believe this thing is only about 1 1/2 inches big and holds all this music. My son sets it up and I turn it on. Woo Hoo..
More Good News: I really want to do better and get better. I am one of those people who need to have a failure moment to proceed forward. Lucky for me failure is always looming if I don't try. /sarcasm
Bad News: This is going to be hard. I don't ever remember having to work real hard to be fit. I just was.
My new goal is to upgrade from a can opener to a hand mixer.
My workout with my trainer yesterday was brutal. Seriously, brutal. I am going to put my one little excuse in before I go on. I forgot my lunch. So after work I went straight to the gym with no food in my belly. Now, normally I can live off the fat of the land and the worst thing that happens is I'm cranky. That was before I met Mr. Muscle builder/killer/drill sergeant/best friend.
I arrived a few minutes early for my workout and the manager suggested I hop on the treadmill. A state of the art, cup holder, remote control in the other space workout machine. Nice and cush. I hopped on and changed the channel from CNN to Bravo to watch Top Chef. Ha, the irony. At least I didn't put it on the Food Network. Off I went on my little stroll.
Here comes my guy. Hey, Kelly. How was your week he asks as he turns up the incline and speed. He disperses with more general chit chat. What's new with you? I proudly told him how I did what I was supposed to do during the past two weeks. Which I did, really I did. He smiles and cranks up the incline and speed. I am really kind of working now, but this is about the intensity I do at home, so I can hang.
More small talk, more cranking of incline, more incline, more incline. I am up to 15 now and at the stage where I can talk, but don't want to. Or, if I did talk it was going to be really mean and hateful. What I want to do is snap off everyone of his fingers on the hand which is turning up the incline. That is what I really, really want to do.
He continues to chat and now we are on the debate on Jessica Simpson's weight trouble. He goes on to say she isn't fat, but if you are marketing yourself as an actress...more talk but I don't know what he is saying now, it's all a blur. I am losing it now. I really am starting to get dizzy from not eating (I hope that's why), it couldn't possibly be that I am more out of shape than I thought.
Where in the hell is my ham sandwich I made for lunch. It was a healthy ham sandwich. Lean ham, mustard and fresh spinach and avocado on Dakota bread. Where is it?
Well, I survived the treadmill and downed two bottles of water, because I sweat out five bottles of water in the last 20 minutes. I really didn't know the treadmill could inflict such harm. Wake up call. Even though I was doing my workouts at home evidently I didn't push myself as hard as I should have.
We proceed to the back for the rest of the workout. Good bye top chefs.
We start doing circuit training. I am struggling, but manage. I am still dizzy. Then he says o.k. it's time to do some up/downs. Up/downs? You mean like what they make football players do at practice? You mean like the ones my son used to complain about while I gave the speech on how he could do anything he set his mind to? Those up/downs? The ones where if I had of eaten my ham sandwich I would have puked it up on his pretty new Nikes. Ahhh, shit. It is those up/downs.
/mental breakdown.
O.K. I do them. They aren't that fast but my form is great, o.k. it's suitable. The song Gonna Make You Sweat Till You Bleed, (Everybody Dance Now) comes on and he turns it up so loud to pump me up. Now, I am doing up/downs, still dizzy and now I have a headache. BUT.... I do them, because like I told my son, if you set your mind to it, you can do it. I will think twice before I give another inspirational speech to my kids. It always, comes back to bite you.
This session was truly a wake up call for me. I knew I was out of shape, but I have always been active. I guess I need to work a lot harder to get back to where I want to be. To my defense he did admit he was extra hard on me because his previous clients of the day were all old people. I guess I should be happy he doesn't consider me to be old people, even though I could be his mom or his really nice aunt.
The good news: I did join this century and bought an I-Pod Shuffle to help me through the tough times. I can't believe this thing is only about 1 1/2 inches big and holds all this music. My son sets it up and I turn it on. Woo Hoo..
More Good News: I really want to do better and get better. I am one of those people who need to have a failure moment to proceed forward. Lucky for me failure is always looming if I don't try. /sarcasm
Bad News: This is going to be hard. I don't ever remember having to work real hard to be fit. I just was.
My new goal is to upgrade from a can opener to a hand mixer.
1 comment:
I'm glad you did it! I'm proud of you for getting with your training after all this time. I had a bad evening of sorts and so I pigged out a little. blech! I must be coming to that time of the month because i can't stop craving crunchies!help...
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