Assuming the world doesn't go to hell in a hand basket which by the way just happens to be sitting next to my future dog in the picture. Her name is Lucille Ball and that is my future living room assuming I get to build my dream home on the mountain.
I love my new career. However, my new job has some new challenges. There are some days I have way too much mellow. One day my shift began in the late afternoon. I was home alone all day, quiet. When I get to work I'm in a dimly lit room with piped in new age music and more quiet for 6 hours.
My last massage of the day was a Swedish, nothing but chill for 55 minutes. When I get to the foot of this man I noticed a sequin. My imagination woke up. Is this man a secret cross dresser who likes shiny dresses? Is he a drag queen and came in for a massage after a grueling day of practice for a Broadway-esque show. Wow, he really didn't fit the bill as a dressy cross dresser, but that would be rude of me to assume he was a frumpy cross dresser. Snap out of it. Well, it seems as usual all of my assumptions were wrong. It wasn't a sequin. It was a corn remover patch. How silly of me. Unless.....he got a corn from wearing high heel shoes!
Speaking of corn...My silverware basket in my dishwasher is falling apart.
I went to the local appliance parts store to get a new one. I brought in the basket so they could see the one I wanted. I plopped it on the counter and the guy looks at it. He starts turning it around and around, then upside down looking for a part number. That's when it happened. Corn fell out. Yup, right there on the counter. I grabbed the basket so fast when I ran out I didn't even look in it. How embarrassing.
The funny thing about corn going through the dishwasher cycle is it comes out whole just like the digestion system. Cool.
This man just looked at me like this happens everyday. He could have assumed I was a dirty lady who doesn't scrape the dishes before putting them in the dishwasher. He would sort of be right. If it is a hectic night I do it half-assed. He could of assumed I come from a corn loving family. Kind of. He could of assumed that my family believes that if a corn goes through the cycle unblemished it's a lucky charm. He would really be wrong because the part he wanted to sell me was $70.00! I assumed he was out of his mind if he thought I was going to spend that kind of money on a plastic basket.
I have a whole lot more of these assumptions, but I am tired and I assume you are bored by now.
I love my new career. However, my new job has some new challenges. There are some days I have way too much mellow. One day my shift began in the late afternoon. I was home alone all day, quiet. When I get to work I'm in a dimly lit room with piped in new age music and more quiet for 6 hours.
My last massage of the day was a Swedish, nothing but chill for 55 minutes. When I get to the foot of this man I noticed a sequin. My imagination woke up. Is this man a secret cross dresser who likes shiny dresses? Is he a drag queen and came in for a massage after a grueling day of practice for a Broadway-esque show. Wow, he really didn't fit the bill as a dressy cross dresser, but that would be rude of me to assume he was a frumpy cross dresser. Snap out of it. Well, it seems as usual all of my assumptions were wrong. It wasn't a sequin. It was a corn remover patch. How silly of me. Unless.....he got a corn from wearing high heel shoes!
Speaking of corn...My silverware basket in my dishwasher is falling apart.
I went to the local appliance parts store to get a new one. I brought in the basket so they could see the one I wanted. I plopped it on the counter and the guy looks at it. He starts turning it around and around, then upside down looking for a part number. That's when it happened. Corn fell out. Yup, right there on the counter. I grabbed the basket so fast when I ran out I didn't even look in it. How embarrassing.
The funny thing about corn going through the dishwasher cycle is it comes out whole just like the digestion system. Cool.
This man just looked at me like this happens everyday. He could have assumed I was a dirty lady who doesn't scrape the dishes before putting them in the dishwasher. He would sort of be right. If it is a hectic night I do it half-assed. He could of assumed I come from a corn loving family. Kind of. He could of assumed that my family believes that if a corn goes through the cycle unblemished it's a lucky charm. He would really be wrong because the part he wanted to sell me was $70.00! I assumed he was out of his mind if he thought I was going to spend that kind of money on a plastic basket.
I have a whole lot more of these assumptions, but I am tired and I assume you are bored by now.
1 comment:
Hey, hey, here I am! : )
Post a Comment